Posts Tagged ‘childbirth’

Hello All.  If you read my blog, you would know that I had my first child in April.  So far, it has been a life changing experience, both good and bad, and I couldn’t picture my life before him.

Was-Cain-or-Seth-Adam's-Firstborn-Son--EL2

So, what are the major changes?

  1. Sleeping in late is OVER:  After age 32-33, I started getting up pretty early on the weekends anyway, but now I get up at the latest, 530-630 am.  As soon my son is up, I am up.
  2. The first month you wont sleep:  I am not going to lie, the first month is tough.  I remember going to work with little sleep day after day.  You eventually get used to it, but by then, my son started sleeping a little better.
  3. Your sleep is never straight through the night.  I am almost 5-months in and I still have to wake up 2-3x a night.  Sometimes it will only be once, sometimes 4, it really depends on his day.
  4. Working out doesn’t change too much:  I only  missed about 3-4 days of weights.  I work out with weights at lunch, so that really didn’t change.  Cardio is a little tougher.  After work I am pretty tired and I also want to get home to see him before he goes to bed.  I have been using a lot of treadmile and 8am weekend running.
  5. Read all you want, but there is no substitute for real life practice and every child is different.  You will QUICKLY find out what they like and what they don’t like.

What are some other major changes?

  • More compassion but less tolerance for bullshit.  For some reason, I feel more compassionate for people with real legitimate problems.  With that being said, I lost all patience for bullshit.  Especially with young lazy people.
  • Become more religions.  If having a child doesn’t do it for you, nothing will.

What about costs:

  • My wife is not working indefinitely, so we have to be on a strict budget.  But to be honest, you have a solid 9 months to prepare, so you don’t have any excuses.  And I got married at age 36, so I wasn’t a rookie.  We paid off almost all debt and so far, it’s a lot cheaper than being single.  Less drinking, eating out and vacations, but more money on health insurance, formula, diapers and utilities.  Overall, not as bad as I thought it would be.

Overall, I can’t say enough how life changing it is to have a child.  Very tiring, but I would say you are crazy to not entertain the idea before its too late.

Do I miss single life? Not really.  Occasionally, I will feel like I am missing out on a big trip.  The key is to get everything done BEFORE you get married.

  • Go to Miami
  • Go to Ireland
  • Go to Japan
  • Go to Mardi Gras

And for the love of god, don’t pass up on having children just to support some stupid corporate job.  Trust me,

-John

Check out my 2 books on amazon.com or support me on patreon!

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I bet you didn’t think I would write about this topic! But my son is almost 3-months old, so now I am a bodybuilder and a father. So, what are my tips for soon to be parents?

1.Get grandma over: I have a ton of energy and I am telling you, the first month is exhausting.  I don’t know how anyone can except to raise a child by yourself.  If you can get the grandmother’s to come over a couple of times a week, it is a lifesaver.  For child #2,  I need to commit the grandmothers’ to staying over more.  We did the first couple weeks mostly by ourselves.

2. Get your finances in order before the child is born.: You have 9-months to plan.  Get all of your hard work done before the child is born.  I took a big licensing test at work right before he was born.  Studying with a newborn is close to impossible.

3. It’s not expensive.  Like I said in step 2, you had 9 months to plan.  I spent a lot more when I was single.  As a single guy I was spending $150-200 a week on going out and another 5-10K a year on travel.  Now it’s just some formula and diapers.

4. Find out what he/she likes:  My son likes it when I play with him and walk him around, but he hates laying on me.  I think he cries a lot less when I hold him , compared to my wife, but we will fall asleep on my wife and not me.  I know what he likes and what he doesn’t, so I stopped trying to force activity on him that makes him scream.

5. Go outside for walks:  75% of the time when we take him outside he will fall asleep and its a great way to get some cardio done. Yesterday we walked 4 miles with him and he slept almost the entire time.

6. Check your insurance:  Insurance is a pain.  Check with your insurance months before your child is born.  I did all of my research and they still snuck some bills on me.  Overall, the delivery is costing me about $6,500 out-of-pocket.

7. Keep working out:  There was a couple of days where I was sleep working out, but overall, exercise helped to keep me sane.

8. Stay inside for a while: It’s bad news if the kid gets sick in the first couple weeks.  I’m on week 10 and I still haven’t taken him to the mall or a restaurant.  Life is long, take it easy for a couple of weeks and order out.  Now that he is almost 15 lbs, it’s not that serious to come down with a small fever or cold. But that could be a rough week if he gets sick as a small infant.

9. Be patient with your wife:  The first child is no joke.  I had ZERO experience with kids before taking my own son home from the hospital.  There will be nights where you are both up 3 in the morning and not in a good mood, try to relax.

10.  Don’t wait to have kids because of a stupid career:  It is risky to have kids later in life and also harder to conceive.  Don’t put off having kids because of some stupid office job.  Having children is life changing.  I had my first child at age 37 and my wife was 36.  We were very lucky to have everything go smooth, but we aren’t going to wait too long for #2.

-John

Check out my book on amazon.com!